9/21/2004

the immigration process

Pathetic. The way our future hinges on impersonal bureaucracy governed by unfeeling immigration laws.

Pathetic. How each official looking form we fill out corresponds to the brightening of the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.

Pathetic. That no matter how much we love each other, miss each other, long for each other, we must remain thousands of miles apart.

Just because we have to go through the proper channels, wait for the proper authorities, have the proper documents.

Sometimes, it's not just pathetic anymore. It's sad.

9/20/2004

Mondays

Disappointment is a pill that leaves a vile taste in one's mouth. It raises questions of misplaced trust and unfounded expectations. Even before 8am today, I had to swallow this bitter pill given by a friend. I guess I was too assuming when I hoped that he will be there to help me out of a jam I was unwillingly forced into.

Less than an hour after that, someone tried playing smart-ass with me. And got a very public put-down for his effort. Usually, I can rise above those kind of remarks. But there are times when I find it too much of an effort to play little Miss Nice. Especially with people who rubs me raw and seems to suck out all the niceness I can offer.

Today was turning out to be one of those I-should-have-stayed-in-bed days.

Luckily, the later half of the day turned out rather well. Lunch with an old friend, tuna sandwich at Almon Marina and flirty boy shorts for a bargain managed to save the day for me.

Hmm. Seems like Mondays can be the dreadful end to a long and refreshing weekend. Or Mondays can be the unsullied start to a brand new week.

I haven't made up my mind yet about Mondays.

9/19/2004

as time goes by

One more week has ended, another has began. Where does all these seconds, and minutes, and hours, and days go?
It seemed like a moment ago when I was feeling the anticipation that Friday inevitably brings.
I feel torn. Torn between trying to grasp each second as they sift through my days and trying to hurry, hurry the passing of time.
I want to savor each day for what it may bring me, teach me, show me. I know that I will never be the same person that I am right now, right this moment.
And yet. I am restless for the new life that awaits me across the ocean, in the arms of the one I love most.